Was there ever a lifetime of peace for any man that has walked this earth. From birth to death. We all need water, food, and shelter. We all breathe the same air.
We are conscious. What has fueled this out-of-control mentality of destruction? I would be a liar if I told you I was innocent and you would be a thief if you told me you were sorry.
I dove deeper into rebellion as the temptation became second-hand. My love no longer existed I told myself but that was a lie. Regardless the devil has awakened. I fought for my love. I consoled her when all was lost with disregard for my own feelings. I believed in my love but she left me in the dark. Have I loved an empty shell of a woman?
I sought to punish all the right I did by my nature and turn to a savor of anti. Up was down. Left was right. I disagreed to agree. The night cast a shadow over a city that was cursed and I was the maitre d. I welcomed that blanket of blindness because I knew that justice would have the last laugh. I wasn’t caving in… I was just going through a systematic change.
I had to take my mind off of her.
My heart rot bitter full of bats that needed to find their way out of the light back into the dark. Why oh my love has taken a breath and a heartbeat that void I need to fill. I don’t want to turn as the moon scars my wound.
Fill me with love again I pray, but God remained silent…
The stars gave me a slight wink as if the back of God was turned and it was OK for me to dam those with a vengeance at the cost of my fallen love. I gained breath and my heartbeat became a drum, a war drum for my destiny!
I took to vanity and prey on impurity. I have become a symphony of hate. Strength was no longer defined as being strong. Strong in faith…it was I who would prove that I loved and I lost.
My first kill. It hasn’t sunken in yet as I washed the majority of his DNA off. Down the drain, it dissipates into the pipes of the Neon City. I often wondered if the sewers had more filth or the life that was above it.
The blood. The throat. The stomach. The chest. Back to his neck. Hack and gash. Open and splat. A repeated cycle of mutilation. Flashbacks of a man that was no longer. Haunted each step I took, but I gave birth to these taunting spirits as my guilt lay heavier considering my previous oath to… to you know who.
I was conflicted about the man I murdered and started to question my destiny. What if she was lying or exaggerating just a little… I became a hunter delirious with a barrage of insecurities that left me in search of her.
The night felt surreal. As I made my way to old neon. Barely recognizing the basic normalities of yesterday. The air I took in was different. The street where I walked many times before felt different. This scent of life was overwhelming. Also, I had a sudden craving for steak for some reason. My appetite… it’s grisly. My mouth-watering for a nice juicy rare steak. My senses were all over the chart with this new destructive feeling of invincibility I had.
My awareness was peaking with every movement the duplicates of the Neon City made. Ecstasy. Barely washed and stained. The blood…just enough to be hidden from their incoherent eyes.
A flashback.
As my dear repented in disgust of the nature in which turn me against my principles. Vaguely described by her confession in detail was the location and face of the rapist. And of course, I did not show her my true face of vengeance as the blood was pumping like a miner who just struck oil. I consoled her, as usual, gave my love a hug, a kiss on her forehead.
Did I react too soon? Did my vengeance make me judge and execute an innocent?
I made it to the red district of old neon in search of Destiny. A street that was engulfed in debauchery. Those lost girls looking for refuge traded their flesh for a warm meal and shelter. The medicine man keeping them numb enough to feel normal. Surrounded by these vendors of false hope I was. I had a sick feeling inside my stomach as I felt the monster grow stronger within. I knew destiny was lurking.
I was making my way to a spot where she stood to sell herself to the highest buyer when I heard the cries of a man who lay hunched over on the pavement. I told him I had no change. I pretended to not hear him but suddenly stopped as the spirit inside me reminded me I still was once a good preacher. A good man.
“Please just help me to my feet and to a cab…” he said.
I saw the look in his eyes…lost. Another soul swallowed up by this superficial place of darkness.
Son, you had too much to drink and your nose is caked with a white crust that tells me you’ve been intensifying your reason to die.
He never responded as I helped him up… I felt death as already convinced him that to die would be better than to live. Just another junkie. I really wanted to help him more than to a cab, but I had to find destiny to clear my mind of any doubt.
Every time I heard sirens I assumed they were coming for me. I wasn’t paranoid really, because if I was caught it would be justifiable. Really I was a man without an identity at this point. Never have I committed a crime let alone a vicious calculated homicide. Who would suspect the preacher? Ha!
As I passed bar after bar I notice a breaking story on the news channel on every tv. Peering through the glass I saw the police are looking for a suspect in the violent murder. Of a prominent city prosecutor…
They had no leads though…
Dam he was a prosecutor…fucking justice! The system is full of hypocrites. That infuriated me! I had to find her and know that I got the right guy…
To Continue Reading the Story click the link: Preacher and his Knife – Opus III
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